I was faced with a choice, at a difficult age. Would I write a book, or should I take to the stage

Monday, February 27


When is she back on TV? Is it soon? We've spent the better part of today cavorting round with a telephone headset pretending to be "confirming the eviction result" with BB. But it isn't the same.

Remember how amazing she is (1):

Gretel: Strife has arisen over the girl and boy toilets. Is this correct, Glenn?
Glenn: Yeah. It is. It's good fun.
Gretel: No it's not. It's grubby and foul.

Remember how amazing she is (2):

Gretel: Who had the most annoying habit?
Dean: Can I say?
Gretel: Yeah.
Dean: Rita,farting out of her front.
Gretel: Actually, no. No. You can't say that.

Remember how amazing she is (3):

Gretel: Hello. Hello. Welcome ... What a fabulous start it is because I was going to read a really interesting intro that's not on the autocue because somebody's unplugged it. Hello! I'll just wildly ad lib. Thank you. Very much. Technology! Now Big Brother's reciting it in my ear. Calm down! I know it - I wrote it. (merrily) You’d better fix this bloody autocue or somebody's going to LOSE THEIR JOB!

HURRY UP CHANNEL 10! FIRE UP BB06! We have had more than enough of Australia's Most Wobbling Fatties (why isn't the disgusting Alex Lloyd on that, incidentally).


At 4:37 pm, Blogger Crystal Gallagher-Starr said...

awwww, but I LOVE Australia's Most Wobbly Fattie! It's much better than BB. Those Gretel quotes are great though.

At 11:29 pm, Blogger Angus said...

I love the fatties too. Did you watch Australia's Brainiest Housemate though? Tim and Chrissie in the same room, it was like a beautiful dream! (They both lost to of all people GEMMA, whose special subject sounded like a whole lot of things she had just made up on the spot--ie "Four of the elements are earth, air, fire and water, name another" "Um...Thought?" "Correct!"--unlike Tim and Chrissie who had proper, intellectual subjects like Federal Politics and 80s music.)

At 11:34 pm, Blogger said...

I really do wish they would just hurry up and put her back on my tv.

Enough is enough. Why isn't she running the country yet?

At 10:28 am, Blogger Woodsman said...

I wish Gretal was hosting Australia's Biggest Fats. One she wouldn't sound borderline retarded attempting to read her lines as "AJ" (if that is her real name) does and two she would look even treser glamourous in her leoperd-print catsuit in comparison to all the fats.
PS Does anyone else think one of the girls on the Red team is actually Casey Donovan????


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