MISSY ELLIOTT: POKIE PROBLEM

Or not, perhaps. But it was quite evident that Missy was itching to get off the stage from her first night of her Australian mini-tour tonight. "Crown Casino," she was barking. "I'm going to the casino. Where's mama's purse?" OF COURSE it was all quite hilarious.

Then there was the clever riverdancing to "Work It", then there was a lot of tedious bossiness about the audience giving each of Missy's dancers separate "props". Then a girl dancer did something unnecessary and hamfisted to "Pussycat". A few more jokes ("No, don't rip my clothes off me! I ain't lost that much weight - you don't wanna see me naked."), a throwing of frankly too many of Missy's unwanted clothes into the audience, and it was all over!

Oh, and Blu Cantrell performed too, though with marginally less success, as she seemed a bit DRUNK, to be honest! At least, she:

* Kept telling the audience how much she loved us and that we shouldn't forget it (Oh we sure won't, Blu!)
* Seemed to think she'd smudged her lipstick and spent minutes trying to fix it up in the reflection of her microphone
* Forgot her own setlist ("How many more songs have I got to go? How many am I doing again? Four? Oh.")