Fop.

2007-08-15T00:14:00.000+10:00

TIME TO GROW UPI'm quitting this place for a while. I will almost certainly be back sometimes when I have something pop-related to bang on about, but I guess I am in a new phase of my life and I need to write some other things, not just about pop music, and I feel like I have painted myself into a bit of a corner with this blog. And I don't know if I even need to write about music anymore; there

2007-07-07T01:14:00.000+10:00

A SMILE'S A FROWN, TURNED UPSIDE DOWNI'm quite sure that I have listened to Happy Go Lucky by Steps over 50 times since the 'Buzz' album came out in 2000, and even though I guess I was struck by the PWL-trademarked 'merry and jaunty sadness' of the story built up by its lyrics, I never really considered it poignant or anything. I remember thinking more about the harmonies in the middle 8, on the

2007-06-30T21:41:00.000+10:00

'We're psychopaths' 'Has it transferred?'Can you watch this amazing thing! BB-UK related.Do watch all of it.OMG.The idiot twins are now in the running to be my favourite ever housemate...If you liked that, you also need this brilliant remix of their audition tape which the effortlessly brilliant Adem cleverly featured on IAR 10 days ago "BARBIES, PINK, WOO." may yet feature in my professional

2007-06-28T06:08:00.000+10:00

RICKI LEE IS SINGING WITH A CARTOON BIRDI'm feeling a strange and urgent mixture of emotions about this:Ricki-Lee Coulter wings it in styleFrom QConfidentialJune 27, 2007 09:31amArticle from: The Courier-MailYOUNG Divas deserter Ricki-Lee Coulter has found a new pop music friend and will warble Hell No! on a specially made video clip with Coco, the cuckoo, on the Cartoon Network today.Yes, she's

2007-06-10T22:16:00.000+10:00

I APPRECIATE THERESEWho wouldn't! Now I don't ask for much but I really must insist on showing you Therese's performance with The Attic - 'The Arrival' from this year's Melodifestivalen. This song should have won Eurovision 2007 if anything was correct at all. I particularly think this effort would be pleasing to the wondrous Scott, To Be Certain, given his ardour for 'This Woman' by Anna Sahlene

2007-05-26T04:19:00.000+10:00

BITCH PLEASERather absently I picked up a little free in-house magazine in a music retailer in London today which I was delighted to see had a little piece half-arsedly attempting to push The Young Divas (aka The Young Beavers aka The Bin aka My Good Girlfriends) on a horrified British public. This article's first sentence described the Beavers as a "hot Australian club act".Let us dissect. Hot.

2007-05-20T07:40:00.001+10:00

ARE THE YOUNG DIVAS STILL A 'GOING CONCERN'But I'm serious! Do my good girlfriends, aka the Rubbish Bin of Aus.Idol-Related Pop, even exist anymore as 'recording artists'? I mean, obviously 'Searchin'' tanked but surely they would be putting 'Gloria' out quite soon to right the wrong? I can't believe a Google news search reveals exactly nothing about their prospects. Not long ago, such a search

2007-05-13T23:06:00.000+10:00

FOR FUCK'S SAKEWhat is she LIKE.

2007-05-04T03:27:00.000+10:00

A FAVOURITE MISHEARD SONG LYRICIt can be found in 'Push It' by Salt n Pepa which lives on the following wondrous piece of plastic:What the actual words are: "Salt n Pepa's here, and we're in effect. Want you push it back."And what I like to pretend they are saying is:"Salt n Pepa's here, and we, in effect, want you to push it back."I just find my version to be a more interesting use of language.

2007-04-14T22:12:00.000+10:00

PINEAPPLE IS PLAYING ALL NIGHTThere are times when I like to buy a CD and then not listen to it properly for several years, and after such time I will remember that I own said disc and listen to it in wonder. Then I will be sad to have missed the boat and have nothing very current to say about it. But I simply don't care at this point; I have been listening to an album from 2002 this week: S

2007-04-10T20:44:00.000+10:00

(BARELY PERCEPTIBLE) VARIATIONS ON A THEMESee this album?I LIKE IT.Things people in London say about this album:* 'That's only for nightclubs.'* 'That's only for chavs.'* 'That's (something to do with girls from Essex).' (<--- Query this)* 'Cascada is shit.'* 'How about The Gossip, you should get their album.'* 'I buy an album in Tesco every week.'* 'I'd be a bit disappointed if The Gossip's

2007-03-19T07:31:00.000+11:00

ON MY ATTENDANCE AT THE UK EUROVISION SELECTION FOR 2007Somehow I managed to blag 2 tickets to the audience of the BBC show Making Your Mind Up, which is the show on which the UK works out what it will send to Eurovision. I attended this last night and these are my comments:* It involved catching various trains out to the Maidstone Studios in the heart of gorgeous Bumfuck, County Kent!* Jim and I

2007-03-12T03:50:00.000+11:00

WHAT ARE THEY SENDING TO EUROVISION 2007: EPISODE 4: SWEDENSweden, we learned last night viewers, are sending The Ark.Look:Do you like that?Their song is this:And we're sorry but it is wildly inferior to at least 3 others in the 2007 Swedish final, even though as a general proposition The Ark are to be supported. We would particularly like to single out the much more deserving preparation of

2007-03-10T20:38:00.000+11:00

WHAT ARE THEY SENDING TO EUROVISION: EPISODE 3 - SERBIAOh goodness.That, viewers, was Marija Serifovic with 'Molitva'.Is it not as though your 'unlucky in love' older cousin from Adelaide has received a phone call from the Serbian delegation to say that the pretty blonde girl originally scheduled to sing Molitva is suddenly unavailable and there is simply no one else available?There is also a

2007-03-04T04:00:00.000+11:00

WHAT ARE THEY SENDING TO EUROVISION? EPISODE 2: ANDORRAAndorra have obviously decided that their lack of success with the previous few years' worth of blandly balladeering ladies (especially the appalling Jenny from last year) requires drastic action. Accordingly, they are providing Anonymous. I was quite sure I would not approve of Anonymous as I only really like the girly schlagery things but

2007-02-25T01:54:00.000+11:00

WHAT ARE THEY SENDING TO EUROVISION THIS YEAR?Episode 1: FinlandIf you had a look at some blogs presently you would think there is nothing good going to Eurovision this year, AT ALL. And admittedly there have been some strange omissions in some of the national selections. I am particularly distressed about Sweden denying everyone's favourite fame-obsessed scary-eyed maniac Linda Bengtzing another

2007-02-16T08:35:00.000+11:00

THE YOUNG DIVASThere is a new photo of the Young Divas! Happy day!(There is something a bit funny about this photo though. And Booby De Rouge looks like a busty barmaid. Regardless of this, I'm thrilled to have a new picture of my good girlfriends and I never look a gift horse in the mouth.)

2007-02-11T23:47:00.000+11:00

BELINDA CARLISLE ON THE GAY LAST NIGHTShe was MERELY PASSABLE. Mainly because she looked like she was going through the motions, doing a G-A-Y PA in order to finance her extravagant Parisian lifestyle, rather than genuinely delighting in entertaining the most easily pleased gays in Christendom. Perhaps this has something to do with her being preoccupied with her creation 'Marcia Cross' and the

2007-02-11T09:54:00.000+11:00

IS THIS SORT OF FUNNYI like to watch this several times a day. I am certain it's done the rounds already, and I don't actually think it's particularly clever or insightful. And it's probably borderline racist (IS IT). I just love, however, the namechecking. And the robot dancing (of RICE).

2007-02-11T09:37:00.000+11:00

AND THE SOUND OF KISS, ON THE STREET OUTSIDEDid I mention that I live in London now? No? Well, it's true, I do. And it means I get to go to things like Belinda Carlisle working it for the gays. Unfortunately I have some information indicating that Bel C might have concocted a setlist drawn mainly from her new Frenchy album, which Jess Ausculture patiently explained to me, is 'pants'. Accordingly,

2007-01-29T10:35:00.000+11:00

WHY DO I NOT OWN THIS ALBUM?Kate Ryan's 'Alive'.What the hell was I DOING when this came out that precluded me from arranging an importation of this to Australia. I ASK MYSELF. This woman is a miracle, a gift. Our lady Katrien Verbeeck as she is surely known in the Flanders portion of La Belgique.Why! Just look at her go, the Katrien! The Jo O'Meara it's OK to like, if you will.

2007-01-28T11:16:00.000+11:00

OH NO SHE DIDN'TIs Ricki-Lee fucking leaving the Young Divas? Why is nobody talking about this? This is what I am reading over at the YD boards:Ricki-Lee's suddenly singleJanuary 25, 2007 01:15amRICKI-LEE Coulter is taking time out from the Young Divas to pursue solo endeavours. She has pulled out of the girls' upcoming performances at the D & D balls nationally, and will instead head overseas to

2007-01-28T05:32:00.000+11:00

THINGS ABOUT UK CELEBRITY BIG BROTHER1. H from Steps as surprisingly likeable if rapidly ageing sweetheart!2. Jo from S Club as dressing-gown wearing, chain-smoking, racism-acquiescing disappointment!3. Shilpa Shetty as England's sweetheart (and possible Eurovision delegate)!4. Some others I can't really be bothered with!5. And a BB host who appears to be slightly better than my beloved Gretel

2007-01-28T05:00:00.000+11:00

A COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY POSTINGI'm quite certain that no one is interested (I barely am myself) but it's interesting to think for a minute about what has happened to the grotesque creation Cosima 'Kosovar' De Vito. I wouldn't have turned my tiny mind to this ridiculous act if I hadn't comedically misread the title of the latest effort of the equally distressing Joanna Newsom 'Cosmia', being

2006-11-28T12:46:00.000+11:00

A THING ABOUT JESSICA MAUBOYYou know what was great about J-Mau? For me, it was the way that, given the choice, all she ever would have sung were Whitney and Mariah ballads. She just LOVES HER SOME WHITNEY AND MARIAH! Forget cred, forget Lily Allen, forget having an acoustic strumalong. Forget Lavina-style reheated R-n-B songs from the olden days. She simply likes to sing the works of her highly

2006-11-22T10:09:00.000+11:00

ADDITIONAL CAROLA-RELATED MATERIALCarola, readers, was in Las Vegas recently, to see Celine Dion’s show. Allegedly she travelled there with her horseriding instructor, Tobias Larsson. Neither Carola nor her agent will comment on whether or not Tobias and Carola were in Las Vegas together. They won’t comment on the alleged romance’s existence either. EDIT: The plot thickens: Tobias has said: "I

2006-11-22T10:08:00.000+11:00

MORE CAROLA!Carola has been celebrating the 30th birthday party of Miss Styling och Konsulting, by performing all of one of her "hitten" out on the gay in Stockholm! And let's note the fabulous venue name: PATRICIA. The wondrous Schlagerboys provide the following commentary:Well, she did say in Athens that she was proud of being a "gay diva" and that she was setting up "Camp Carola". And it

2006-11-01T12:05:00.000+11:00

AND IN CAROLA-RELATED NEWS:Surely you recall the frankly bonkers Carola, who reignited Sweden's Eurovision fortunes this year as follows:She came 5th. A good result for Sweden, mainly due to:* flags* wind machines* great song* performance in the style of Nancy Wilson of Heart* cannily shutting right up about her involvement in Livets Ord, the Scandinavian equivalent of the Hillsong Church, and

2006-10-25T16:43:00.000+10:00

HELLO, I'M VERY LOVELY AREN'T IPLEASE GIVE URGENT CONSIDERATION TO ANTHONY CALLEA'S AMAZING NEW HAIRCUT AND OVERALL IMAGE.

2006-10-25T16:23:00.000+10:00

I SAID BITCH PLEASEHere we have a Youtube clip of the Young Divas performing their new single "Happening All Over Again" at a suburban shopping centre.The following comment has been made in relation to this clip by a Youtuber called Halag:Not great. I like these girls but this sounds awful. Apart from Paulini's solo they sound very shrieky/screechy and the song is too repetitive. Also they mess

2006-10-25T09:46:00.000+10:00

A MATTER I LIKE TO GIVE SOME THOUGHT TO PERIODICALLYOh! Remember back in the day when Leann Rimes piqued everyone's interest by busting out a short repertoire of really good songs? "Right kind of wrong"? "Life goes on"? "Suddenly"? And commissioned scads of dance mixes for gays? And how it used to be such a lark to spread highlarious rumours about how her duet with her brother Busta should not be

2006-10-24T15:04:00.000+10:00

I'M GOING CRAZY! (JUST TO LET YOU KNOW)I'm trying to think about blogging again, about what I used to do here. I'm not sure that I can make any commitment to having an online life - at least, not at the moment. Is it worth me putting up the occasional thing here? I do, periodically, have remarks to make. Mainly in relation to the Young Divas (speaking of which, does anyone have any information

2006-09-04T15:00:00.000+10:00

STEVE IRWIN HAD BETTER NOT BE GETTING A STATE FUNERALBut if he is, it should be done like this:

2006-09-01T17:53:00.000+10:00

WE AMUSE OURSELVES SO

2006-09-01T15:39:00.000+10:00

A LATE ADDITION TO THE DIVAS BILL

2006-09-01T14:27:00.000+10:00

CHEAP AT TWICE THE PRICE

2006-09-01T13:05:00.000+10:00

WE CANNOT STOP WITH THIS NEW TOY

2006-09-01T12:49:00.000+10:00

OUT OF RETIREMENT TO BRING YOU THE FOLLOWING

2006-04-05T12:35:00.000+10:00

BB06 STARTS IN 18 DAYSDo people remember how GOOD this show was, and how amazing it will be to have it back? We all need to be grateful it's coming back at all, and "ramp up", as they say, the excitement accordingly.Let's review one of last year's finest moments from the official BB online diary, shall we?21:36 Christie dresses Greg in her white crocheted backless shirt, and David in a black and

2006-03-23T10:20:00.000+11:00

WORST PHOTO EVERIt is surely this:

2006-03-19T15:25:00.000+11:00

"I SAY THROW IT DOWN.""All mah people in the club"Cassy is performing at the Closing Ceremony, what what WHAT? Cassy "Casey" Donovan? Where is Dannii? Oh sorry, we forgot - she's fully occupied putting the "finishing touches" on her alleged "album" - something that has apparently kept her completely occupied for the past two years. At least Cassy WANTS a career in the music industry. Sometimes,

2006-03-16T09:15:00.000+11:00

DELTA DELTA DELTACall us perverse but we honestly LOVED Old Granny Goodrem’s song last night at the Commonwealth Games opening ceremony. That was unexpectedly REALLY GOOD. Did The Veronicas write her that MUCH better than most “inspirational” songs that Australia tends to bash out specially for sporting occasions (eg, Amorosi, V; Arena, T). A HIGHLY LOVELY AND UPLIFTING SONG INDEED we would hope

2006-03-01T17:32:00.000+11:00

AND ANOTHER MATTERDoes Kylie have elastics on the end of her plaits on the cover of the Never Too Late single? OR NOT? And IF NOT, then how on earth are the plaits kept in place.That is a legitimate matter for us to query at this juncture.

2006-03-01T17:01:00.000+11:00

THE HAIRHAT ALBUMWhile we're on the subject of Kylie, can we just ask: why doesn't anyone ever talk about/exclaim over the cover of the hairhat album these days? This is one of her greatest hats. Look at her - she's such a BABY! Naively thinking she can get away with piling all her monstrous curls on top of a inner tube from out of a child's trike in a deceptive simulacrum of a "hat". "Don't

2006-03-01T12:02:00.000+11:00

NEVER TOO LATENow. Kylie Minogue, “Never Too Late”. A chirpy work of pop genius, obviously. One of our favourites, in fact. But something unsettling came to us as we were listening to it recently. Have you ever considered how utterly tragic this song is lyrically? It really does wade into some unexpectedly dark and heart-rending territory, this story of a young woman whose apparently limitless

2006-02-28T14:13:00.000+11:00

SOME EXPLANATIONOh look. Sorry about all the grumpiness in the below post. We’re really just irritated by this which happened yesterday in the ARIA singles chart: 26 - NEW 26 BIOLOGY Girls AloudThat was pretty bad. The album isn't even top 50! We're so disappointed and even though we'd like to ask WHY this has happened, Girls Aloud are lazy and they didn't do enough promotion; why would you fly

2006-02-28T11:39:00.000+11:00

EXTREME BORING FILM DEPRECIATION MANIA - OSCARS 2006 EDITIONThe Academy is certainly celebrating a lot of lifeless product this year. Which is very unusual isn’t it. With the exception of Transamerica which we are hoping is at least “quite good”, all the big ticket films are, we’re not afraid to say, FUCKING BORING. We don’t care anymore! We’re saying it! These films are a SNORE! Why isn’t The

2006-02-28T11:16:00.000+11:00

COMING SOONEXTREME BORING FILM DEPRECIATION MANIA: OSCARS 2005 EDITION.

2006-02-27T15:26:00.000+11:00

WHERE IS GRETELWhen is she back on TV? Is it soon? We've spent the better part of today cavorting round with a telephone headset pretending to be "confirming the eviction result" with BB. But it isn't the same.Remember how amazing she is (1):Gretel: Strife has arisen over the girl and boy toilets. Is this correct, Glenn?Glenn: Yeah. It is. It's good fun.Gretel: No it's not. It's grubby and

2006-02-27T12:23:00.000+11:00

OOH, HATE MAILLook what we have received!Dear FOPI have not seen “Capote” yet. I am looking forward to it.Your lack of knowledge about this great writer and his accomplishments bathes in the underbelly of your inept, insufficient, intolerable review of this film and the life of Truman Capote. Blogging is a privilege borne out of mans need to espouse his thoughtless views to an otherwise stupid

2006-02-26T14:48:00.000+11:00

SEE THIS FILM?It is SO TERRIBLY BORING. SO BORING! Rather like eating a cardboard box! Well crafted, technically excellent, MAYBE SO! But who cares about that when the fact remains that we walked out of it in a stupor. You could easily go comfortably to sleep in this film. Even all the actors in it looked bored. Perhaps things were just more boring in the olden days (when this film is set). It's

2006-02-23T11:57:00.000+11:00

"COME ON?"For us, it is currently all about Marie Serneholt (her what used to be in the A Teens) and her alarmingly great debut solo single "That's the way my heart goes". Brilliantly, the way Marie's heart actually does go, at least according to this song, is: "Dum de dum de dum dum de HEY!" The fabulous Jessica is still offering up this song over at her MP3 blog Into the Groove and if you want

2006-02-19T18:13:00.000+11:00

FOP SYMPOSIUM 2005: REVIEW #14 A good natured woman, La Nadine. She put up with a very long wait for her painstakingly close reading of The Little Trees' "Help, I'm A Fish! (I'm A Little Yellow Fish)" to be placed up on here, but she also allowed/encourage us to jiggle her ample bosomry one night late last year at The Napier in a comedy display of burlesque. What an odd evening THAT was. Anyway

2006-02-19T17:58:00.000+11:00

FOP SYMPOSIUM 2005: REVIEW #13Mel, from A Wild Young Under-Whimsy, we are sorry! Every time we see you out and about in Melbourne in your capacity as girl-about-town we have some outrageous excuse as to why we haven't put up your Symposium contribution yet. It is up now! We don't know about her appraisal (we'll give you "thin and amateurish vocals" in a minute) but we are obviously as pleased as

2006-02-19T17:46:00.000+11:00

FOP SYMPOSIUM 2005: REVIEW #12 Although our Symposium is really a blogger round table, we thought that, given the high-minded subject matter of "Help, I'm A Fish! (I'm a Little Yellow Fish)", we needed someone with some format of specialised knowledge in the field of fish to speak to the "work". So we asked our dear friend Simone, currently finishing a doctorate in Anthropology with a particular

2006-02-19T17:32:00.000+11:00

FOP SYMPOSIUM 2005: REVIEW #11 Guy, once of The Symposiasts (do you still work there? Pleae don't bust up with Elanor, we simply couldn't stand the disintegration of another of our favourite duos) and now of wondrous solo project Bowling Ball, is a serious young academic type and we imagine has little time in his day for the consideration of childish ESL pop fripperies. But happily, he agreed to

2006-02-19T17:24:00.000+11:00

FOP SYMPOSIUM 2005: REVIEW #10 The lovely Michael now resides principally over at the Lizjournals - but you may not know that he was once a part of the almighty duo known as The Love Pavilion which inspired Fop to come into existence back in November 2003. We often try to get him and Crystal back together for a LP reunion tour, and while it doesn't look likely just now, you just never really KNOW

2006-02-19T17:11:00.000+11:00

FOP SYMPOSIUM 2005: REVIEW #9Jellyfish is sadly absent from blogging for a time until such time as she has reliable internet access again. But she has proved herself to be an ideal candidate for participating in a blog-and-Lizjournal community review-off of "Help, I'm a Fish! (I'm a Little Yellow Fish)" by The Little Trees. Not only is Jellyfish, at least nomenclature-wise, a sea creature

2006-02-19T17:04:00.000+11:00

GRAND FINALE!Fop Symposium 2005 is about to reach its nadir zenith. Yes, we're about to put up the contributions that we've been sitting on for a time. This represents our utter laziness and lack of responsibility with this whole blog, we can't help but feel. Anyway. We're sorry, as there is some brilliant writing on The Little Trees' magnum opus that we've been keeping from view. BUT NOT FOR

2006-02-16T14:32:00.000+11:00

"IT IS ALL ABOUT ENERGY AND HAVING FUN"Oh viewers it's been such a great week for silly Australian popstrel quotes. For instance, look at Sophie Monk hilariously blethering on:ON THE PAINFUL ROAD OF TRAINING TO BE A SUCCESSFUL THESPIAN:"Everyone said, 'You really think you'll make it?'. I had so many people saying, 'Seriously Sophie, you haven't even done acting'. I said, 'I know I can do it,

2006-01-30T15:32:00.000+11:00

SCREAM SCREAM SCREAMP!nk album cover art!!Needless to say, GREAT.

2006-01-27T21:47:00.000+11:00

pH TESTWe're a bit embarrassed not to have discovered this sooner, especially considering we were actually visitors to the nation of Sweden the week this song was released, but GOOD HEAVENS, LENA "PH" PHILIPSSON has done something quite excellent hasn't she.The song is called "Han jobbar i äffar" and we understand it to have been her most recent single. It is currently our best thing ever! We

2006-01-25T11:30:00.000+11:00

euro-VISSI-onGracefully ageing Greek pop diva Gretel Killeen Anna Vissi has been confirmed as the Greek representative for Eurovision 2006! OH YES. This is sure to infuriate Vissi's longtime rival Despina Vandi, who bitched recently that "Anna Vissi is too old and tired these days to represent Greece or any other country in the Eurovision Song Contest. We don’t want to be embarrassed, after all."

2006-01-24T12:24:00.000+11:00

AN ALARMING TREND What is with all the tedious indie male covers of fun pop songs, please? Indignation is the only correct response, given the smug, sneering irony with which these covers are routinely performed.We mean, ONLY RECENTLY:Coldplay did Madonna (Hung Up)Starsailor did Sugababes (Push the Button)Arctic Monkeys did Girls Aloud (Love Machine)Lost Prophets did Rachel Stevens (Sweet Dreams

2006-01-20T16:45:00.000+11:00

MANDY MOORE IS MAKING A BIG MISTAKEThe lovely Mandy has been running her mouth in respect of her back catalogue. INCLUDING HER AMAZING SECOND ALBUM. This one:Here is what she said to Glamour Magazine for an interview in its February issue, about her first two albums:"Ugh, those were awful--just awful! If I had the money, I would give a refund to everyone who bought my first two albums. Whenever

2006-01-20T10:04:00.000+11:00

ON "HOLIDAY SHOWDOWN"Australia is lucky enough to have the new series of the UK reality carcrash Holiday Showdown on our screens at the moment. You know the one - like Wife Swap, but it's holidays, instead of wives, that get swapped. The ITV website describes it in the following dubious terms: “An award-winning ITV1 series that lifts the lid on the vastly different holiday choices that different

2006-01-20T09:31:00.000+11:00

"Geri Halliwell I found was unprofessinal"If you've had anything to do with a Kylie Minogue messageboard over the past 8 years or so, then chances are you've got at least a passing acquaintance with a crazed Kylie fan going by the name of Sarah Ure. Every day for Sarah is one of an Extreme Kylie Appreciation Mania of the most demented variety available. This usually means:1. LISTING OFF a

2006-01-18T21:38:00.000+11:00

DANNII MINOGUE, WE ARE SORRYThough we didn't mean it that way, doesn't the title of this post sound like something a club announcer would say while explaining to the punters that Dannii was a surprise stand-in live PA that evening (ie, "Unfortunately Roisin Murphy can no longer be with us this evening. Instead we have for you Dannii Minogue - we are sorry."). But no! We want to apologise to

2006-01-18T14:47:00.000+11:00

LET US DO OUR (REVIEW OF) 1-2 STEPIt's disgraceful that we were just looking at our half-arsed "Fop: to do" list and noticed that one of many outstanding items scrawled there is "provide commentary on Ciara '1-2 Step'", a song which came out almost a year ago. We are so very slack, as Guy Symposiast, Jellyfish, Mel and other Fop Symposiast 2005 participants whose contributions we haven't put up

2006-01-18T08:40:00.000+11:00

IT'S THE WAY THAT SHE TALKS, IT'S THE WAY THAT SHE WALKSViewers, it's that time of year again where, as Australians, we must complete our giddy annual season of Andrew G-worship and prepare for the new year of celebration and appreciation of Our Lady Gretel Killeen. That's right. Goodbye, Andrew; HELLO GRETEL it's so nice to have you back where you belong She will be back on our screens in Big

2006-01-17T11:36:00.000+11:00

LEANN RIMES ECZEMA SCANDALWhile we're on the LeAnn Rimes "tip", we should mention that a good portion of the RimesTimes website is taken up with the following sort of thing:The thing is, though, that it is very difficult to find out on that RimesTimes site what LeAnn personally has done about her eczema. It all just links through to a Novartis Pharmaceuticals page about steriod-free treatments

2006-01-17T11:20:00.000+11:00

LEANN RIMES, EUROPOP SENSATIONDo you like LeAnn Rimes, viewers?Of course! In case you're not sure, here's the correct order to like the famous Rimes siblings:1. LeAnn2. Busta.LeAnn wins!And in other great news, LeAnn has been hard at work hammering out an interesting journal entry over at her website, RimesTimes. LeAnn posted this yesterday:"Well today has been crazy. I have been trying to work

2006-01-12T18:49:00.000+11:00

WATER'S RUNNING IN THE WRONG DIRECTIONOr at least, it WILL be, from the perspective of THE MIGHTY GIRLS ALOUD who are GOING TO BE HERE IN AUSTRALIA! SOON! To promote things! We've just spent almost an hour photoshopping a picture of Shirley Clamp into the group as an extra member to celebrate (the result can only be described as "embarrassing to all concerned")! And to make matters even more

2006-01-07T10:32:00.000+11:00

TINA KNOWLES! YOUR DESIGNS ARE HIDEOUS! (PART XVIII)Beyonce has never looked more unpleasant than she does in the video for the inanely-titled "Check On It". We suddenly feel new and unconditional contempt for the entire Knowles empire.GO TO HELL, BEYONCE KNOWLES, YOU COMPLETE COCKHEAD!

2006-01-07T08:08:00.000+11:00

KYLIE MINOGUE "ONE BOY GIRL" - APPRECIATE IT, BITCHESShe's been gone so long, the Kylie, that it's time for some irregular remembrances, we feel. Take "One Boy Girl", a work of considerable excellence (and one of her first non-SAW songs TO BOOT). And it's where Kylie-rap was invented (see also "Secret (Take You Home)", "Shocked", other)Best bits:1. The Poetess - "Hey yo Kylie." Kylie (nonchalant,

2006-01-06T11:53:00.000+11:00

PETE BURNS!!Celebrity Big Brother disappeared from Australian TV after a single season a few years back. Until it is returned (and why isn't it, please? God knows Tiffani Wood , Alex Lloyd and Cosima could do with the work), we intend to stay abreast of the ever-fabulous UK version of the show through the lens of Michael Bush (ex-The Love Pavilion)'s Lizjournal. After 1 day, Michael has anointed

2006-01-03T09:03:00.000+11:00

oh, NORats/mice!In Fop towers!!Get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get them out, get

2006-01-02T21:25:00.000+11:00

JOHN SAFRAN'S 'SPEAKING IN TONGUES'Have you noticed how this brilliant program becomes increasingly bonkers every week? It really is great that in these times of lean artistic economy and commercially-driven entertainment, John Safran can devote a segment of his show (for two weeks running) to antagonising his co-host into saying whether they're friends in real life, à propos of very little. (To

2006-01-02T20:58:00.000+11:00

VERONICA MARSCall us mad but it appears to be FRIGGEN AMAZING.Or maybe our standards have slipped in terms of what we expect from televisual entertainments. But anyway, this show is now in our Shows We Watch. Because:1. Kenneth Nguyen from out of The Age likes it, and we basically like everything he likes and are getting a bit obsessive about this2. The lead character is a schoolgirl detective!

2006-01-02T13:00:00.000+11:00

ANDREW G HAS A NEW BLOGOh yes he DOES! Our beloved! Over here! He's way better than you'd think in blog form - just give him a chance; you'll love him like we do (if you can overlook the overuse of exclamations like "Oh man" and "awesome" which are faintly endearing if you sort of think about it really *swoons*)WE LOVE THE G; STOP THE DERISION. He likes having a great time with his mates, having

2006-01-02T11:02:00.000+11:00

FOP SYMPOSIUM 2005: REVIEW #8 No one got as outwardly cranky than Ausculture when we became shithouse at actually usuing the material we'd actively solicited for the 2005 Symposium. "I spent AGES on that, FOR YOU!" Jess screamed. We got really scared and started making excuses and brandishing Robyn albums to distract her. It worked, and then it didn't. She's probably still completely pissed at us

2006-01-02T10:41:00.000+11:00

FOP SYMPOSIUM 2005: REVIEW #7 Do you know, the consistently amazing and highly benevolent Fluffy from up at that veritable house of comfort-and-joy Fluffy As A Cat was one of the most enthusiastic respondents to our call for participation in the 2005 Symposium. She bloody WAS. Then we didn't put up her work and she probably hates us which would be QUITE FAIR ENOUGH. She is a forgiving sort though

2006-01-02T10:15:00.000+11:00

WE RESOLVE...WE RESERVE...WE HAVE A RESERVATION...It's 2006, no longer 50 degrees in Melbourne and we have a day off. So there's really no reason not to eat a little cake on a decorative plate and make a few half-arsed resolutions for la nouvelle annee. We only really have one worth sharing, which is to be a better and more responsible blogger. In 2005 we were really pretty shit, all things

2005-11-28T04:19:00.000+11:00

THINGS:So, we are in New York City for a couple of hours still, and we have to tell you that there is no doubt that this is THE BEST CITY EVER. We will perhaps make arrangements to move here, as they say in some circles, "forthwith". We even have come to like coffee poured out of a jug! You know the kind? Yes! That! Get out espresso, come in PERCOLATING JUG! Our brains are operating in a faintly

2005-11-25T03:44:00.000+11:00

WE ARE IN NEW YORKAnd we are pleased to see the world hasn't stopped in our absence, ie:Now that American Airlines has finally located our luggage, we will be spending today trying to charm New Yorkers into kissing the Giss as per the demands of all the blogerati, which is probably going to be tricky because (a) it is "Thanksgiving" and everyone is inside eating a pie, and (b) it is completely

2005-11-18T18:35:00.000+11:00

KISS THE GISS CAMPAIGN 2005Oh, we are SO supporting this one...Laura Gissara! To perform the official song for the Australian World Cup team!Just look what the CFBgoespop ladies have initiated! This is the brilliant email Alyson sent to Football Australia...Hi guys!Like most Australians, I am now firmly on board your bandwagon in regards to the 2006 World Cup - I offer my most sincere

2005-11-18T18:23:00.000+11:00

PARKER! POSEY! MINDLESS! DESTRUCTION!Kindly "get across" the following can you:1. Parker Posey is currently living in Sydney! Potts Point, to be precise.2. She has reportedly TRASHED HER POSH APARTMENT there! (You see she's scratched the marble, the toilet brush is missing and she's spilled something on the carpet, from what we can glean from off the electronic lattice.)3. Which she's been

2005-11-18T17:54:00.000+11:00

POP SIBLINGS: EDITION 3How nice, it's the highly musical Lee family! Ann from that "2 Times" business, and her moderately more successful brother Ben! However ARE you both.Yes we're good thanks.

2005-11-18T17:50:00.000+11:00

POP SIBLINGS: EDITION 2Ooh, nearly startled us there SUFJAN STEVENS AND YOUR SISTER RACHEL. Well do come on in, the Rimes kids Busta and Leann will almost certainly be pleased to have some company.

2005-11-18T17:44:00.000+11:00

POP SIBLINGS: EDITION 1(In which we bring little known brothers and sistersWhy, it's Leann Rimes and her mad half-brother, Busta!"We're just a very traditional southern Baptist family," comments Leann. "Busta and I would always sit around after supper, making up little songs. That's why our present styles are very similar."Yes, that's a tune we've heard before, isn't it viewers.

2005-11-15T15:24:00.000+11:00

LAURA GISSARA'S AMAZING FRINGEAppreciate it, bitches!Won't it be INCREDIBLE to see her perform again on Sunday! GET READY! HERE SHE COMES! GO THE GISS!

2005-11-11T16:54:00.000+11:00

A RATHER UNSETTLING TRANSITIONAlthough we love Madonna forever, we just cannot accept the following conversion:1992:"I wouldn't have turned out the way I was if I didn't have all those old-fashioned values to rebel against. I have the same goal I've had ever since I was a girl. I want to rule the world...to me, the whole process of being a brush stroke in someone else's painting is a little

2005-11-11T09:44:00.000+11:00

IT APPEARS WE HAVE A DIRECT LINE TO KATE "DE ROUGE"As per our instructions, she’s doing "Like A Prayer" on Sunday along with Emily’s fabulous "Whitney and Britney hour" on what is officially the gayest Australian Idol show ever (except maybe for the period in season two where Anthony and Ricki-Lee were both still in it). This is the most success this website has ever had, you know. Someone doing

2005-10-31T21:35:00.000+11:00

FOP SYMPOSIUM 2005: REVIEW #6 One of the best things that has happened in Australian pop blogging this year is that the ladies down at CFBgoespop have abandoned their highly unpopular decision to close down their collaborative wonderland at the end of 2005, after 4 acclaimed series of busting it out on Girlfriend, Collette, Venke Knutson and similar. They are keeping it going for 2006! To be

2005-10-31T21:23:00.000+11:00

FOP SYMPOSIUM 2005: REVIEW #5 Ooh goodness, we're a bit late in finishing this, aren't we. (Over here is an explanation of what this is ALL ABOUT.) It's quite alright for us to be slovenly when we haven't implicated other people, but when our gorgeous blogger chums have busted a veritable gut at our behest and then we forget what we're meant to be doing because we decide to create a miniature map

2005-10-31T16:17:00.000+11:00

HER VERY GREATEST HATSYes, it's the horse-racing and we could not care less, frankly. We would probably like it if we had an invitation to the Emirates marquee, but there appears to have been an administrative oversight and so we will stay home tomorrow and sulk manfully instead. The only good thing about the Spring Racing Carnival is that it appears to be the raison-d'etre for this following

2005-10-31T10:41:00.000+11:00

SQUEALThings:1. As you know, we love Gretel Killeen an awful lot round these parts, and like nothing more than measuring the value of things in tiny Gretels. But while she's off-air (having quite possibly gone to the snow, with Lisa Ho), can we just say that we also love Andrew G! Always have. And we forget to talk about it all the time because we're busy banging on about Gretel, Dannii and

2005-10-25T18:22:00.000+10:00

HAIR APPARENTYou know, we bloody hate Paulini. Remember her? Australian Idol series 1 Hillsonger with an album of ballads and an axe to grind (for Jesus). Anyway, she's BACK, and we're SO excited. Look, can you, at the stills from the video for her probably-terrible new single "Rough Day":Girlfriend is doing hair! With her girlfriends!She misses the bus BUT DOESN'T SEEM TO CARE MUCH and why would

2005-10-13T11:10:00.000+10:00

"GOD?""Everyone must stand alone"Dear Kate "De Rouge" (<-- that's not how you say it!!!) from off Australian IdolNow. We have determined that you must sing "Like A Prayer" this week, being as it is 80s theme night. Imagine if Lee gets that song; he will WRECK it completely, smiling all "the while". Is it too late? Surely not. Get that bonkers Erena woman on the case! If Melanie C can see fit to

2005-10-12T17:39:00.000+10:00

WHAT SHOULD THAT ANCIENT EMBARRASSMENT JULIA ROBERTS DO NEXT: A CAREFUL ANALYSISDo you know, we like NOTHING MORE than poking through the forums on the Incorrect Movie Database on a tedious Wednesday afternoon. We do! We really do. And it occurred to us for one reason or another to see what people "on the street" are saying about mole-tastic HOLLYWOOD ACTRESS JULIA ROBERTS. Because she seems to